Why Self-Reliance Doesn’t Work
But what's the alternative?
A conversation with Michelle Mills-Porter
There I was, sitting in a room full of professionals, listening to Michelle Mills-Porter share her extraordinary truth: "Every single person has something to offer. Everybody has value."
And then she did something that made my stomach drop, she invited us to prove it. Right there. In real time.
While others confidently shared what they could contribute, I found myself in a familiar panic. I couldn't identify what I had to offer this room.
Worse still, when it came to making requests, I couldn't even identify what I needed.
That old voice, the one that whispers you're not enough, you don't belong here, suddenly became very loud.
Michelle's wisdom comes from surviving the 2004 Boxing Day (or Stephen’s Day as we call it in Ireland) tsunami, where she witnessed something profound about human nature when everything else gets stripped away.
In that makeshift camp of survivors, hierarchy disappeared overnight. Titles meant nothing. What mattered were the "little things"; essentials like someone's Girl Guide fire-building skills, another person's ability to be a source of calm, a broken Nokia phone that became a lifeline through pure collaboration.
My burning desire to talk to Michelle after her presentation, was rooted in having just about survived my own private tsunami at the end of 2023: when I literally broke down from the stress and exhaustion of trying to ‘make it’ as as a one-woman wolf pack.
I shared with her how that experience and the deeper recovery it gave rise to, taught me how self-reliance, a strategy I've worn all my life like armour, might actually be keeping me stuck in survival mode.
I am reeling from the revelation that is still unfolding in the wake of meeting Michelle & hearing her message.
When the student is ready… and all that.
So grateful for this magnificent conversation. This one's for the part of you that's been convinced you have nothing valuable to offer the world.
Tune in to hear:
Why self-reliance doesn’t work & what the alternative is
Why I almost QUIT on my recovery & what happened instead.
Michelle's take on the key to our collective evolution.
And the results of my ESSENCE analysis (a tool developed by Michelle via THE PEOPLE READER) & a powerful challenge to us all.
Connect with Michelle on LINKEDIN, FACEBOOK and her WEBSITE
And leave us a comment to share your biggest takeaway from this episode.
Amanda x
Hero image: Sisyphus image by Jeffrey Hummel courtesy of Fine Art America