What Wants To Be Born Through You

Won't wait for permission. And neither should you.

This is a companion piece to podcast episode 42, in which I share about my 16 years of "failed" attempts to birth The Serenity Project and why your messy iterations matter.

There's something sacred wanting to be expressed through you.

You feel it, don't you? That persistent nudge, that creative restlessness, that sense that you're meant to bring something into the world, but… you're not quite sure what it is yet.

I know because I've been tending that flame for 16 years.

The Long Gestation

In 2009, I started something called "Girlwise". It was a nail art and self-esteem party service for 8-13 year old girls.

I talk more in the podcast about what my intention was for that offering, but suffice it to say, I was hoping to impart to this particular demographic, skills I wish had been imparted to me at that age.

After three parties, I realised I was completely out of my depth and shut it down.That "failure" sent me to college for a degree in counselling.

Which led to my own therapy..
Which led to reclaiming my creativity..
Which led to teaching art journaling online..
Which led to getting sober..
Which led to coaching..
Which evolved into my first coaching offer called "Tender”..
Then “Stop The Spiral”..
Then"Creative Wayfinding”..
Then "The Pilgrim's Way"..

Each iteration taught me something. Each "failed" version was actually a stepping stone to what wanted to emerge.

Last month, it finally clicked when a client, upon my sharing some recovery wisdom with her said to me: "God, I wish I was an alcoholic."

She was being facetious, but the longing beneath her words was real. She could see the transformation that recovery principles had created in my life; the serenity, the clarity, the tools for navigating chaos.

And she wanted that too.

But, not being an alcoholic, she didn't qualify for traditional 12 step recovery. She wasn't "broken enough" to access the solution.

In that moment, 16 years of iteration suddenly made perfect sense.

The Serenity Project Was Born

What I've been gestating all these years suddenly came into clear focus.

All those "failed" attempts were necessary. Girlwise taught me I needed skills. College gave me the foundation. Getting sober gave me the scaffolding to build something of my own. Every iteration was preparing me for what wanted to be born.

“what you seek is seeking you”. My vision painting that came through at the end of 2023; promising a transformation that would come into form & bear fruit BUT only if I surrender.

Your Sacred Work Is Waiting

Here's what I know about the thing trying to emerge through you:

It won't wait for you to feel ready. I felt completely unequipped for Girlwise and every iteration since, but “doing it anyway” has always led me exactly where I needed to go.

It will evolve through iteration, not perfection. Each version teaches you what the next version needs to be.

It's already sacred, even in its messy form. Every attempt, every "failure," every pivot is part of the holy work of creation.

The flame that's flickering in you, that sense of purpose, that creative restlessness, that feeling that you're meant for something more; it's not asking you to have it all figured out.

It's asking you to tend to it. To feed it. To give it small expressions so it can show you what it wants to become.

Eventually. Don’t forget that part.

Tending Your Flame

Start where you are. Use what you have. Do what you can.

The thing wanting to be born through you doesn't need your permission to be perfect. It needs your willingness to begin, to iterate, to trust the process of becoming.

Your creative restlessness is proof of that. I know every false start feels like another kick in the nads, but it’s not. They’re the Braxton hicks preparing you for the sacred labour that will eventually birth your thing.

But on its own timeline, not yours.

If I was in charge of my timeline, Girlwise would have worked the first time around.

It would not have merely been the starting point of a 16-year pilgrimage to finally realise what the fuck I”m doing out here.

Your iterations are preparing you for something you can't even imagine yet.

What you seek is seeking you. The world needs what wants to emerge through you. Even if (especially if) you can't see the full picture yet.

What's Trying To Emerge In You?

If you're feeling stuck in patterns that keep you from your creative calling and the calm clarity you need to birth your work into the world, you're not alone.

Sometimes the thing blocking our creative emergence is our unexamined relationship with chaos and the exhausting need to have it all figured out before we begin.

This is what The Serenity Project is all about. Listen to the podcast for more and Download my free guide: "5 Signs You're Choosing Chaos Over Sanity" to get started and discover what might be keeping you from what you need to tend your sacred flame.

Your life's work is waiting. Not for perfection; for courage.